13 January 2006
7. All Set
Like Love or Deuce, All Set sounds like a tennis situation. Welcome back to Wimbledon, where Connors and McEnroe are All Set. But it is not a part of that game as far as we know.
What it is is an overused catch-all phrase that everybody says constantly (including us) most likely without even knowing it or thinking about it. It is a meaningless thing people say in response to a nearly infinite set of circumstances. You hear it at restaurants, when waiters want to know if you have finished your meal, or when you have put money/credit card in the leatherette check folder. "Would you like fresh-ground pepper?" "No, thank you. I am All Set." You hear it at the conclusion of ordering something over the phone, or making an appointment or reservation. We have even heard it said at the conclusion of baiting a fish hook. "Here--you are All Set. Now, I will start a chum-line."
In the main, All Set implies either readiness or the completion of a task or activity. But can a waiter not say instead, "Shall I take the check?" or "Shall I clear the table?" Cannot the fishmonger cry "Let us ply the seas!" upon skewering the bait?
If All Set were to become a defined situation, distinguishable from say, Half Set, or Not Set, or even The Null Set (if we remember our Logic* correctly), then we would be more inclined to continue accepting it as part of the lexicon. If one could respond to the question, "Are you ready?" with, "No. I am quarter set. A moment longer, please," it would make all the difference in the world.
Barring this development, though, we are determined to exorcise this demon from our vocabulary. We urge all others to do the same.
______________
*We suddenly experienced a vivid echo of the past as soon as we typed this. We took a Logic course in college taught by this man. He was a splendidly odd person with an outsized, gangly body and a high voice. Sadly, he was not able to illuminate the mysteries of this impenetrable subject to us. We got a C+. But one day he walked into the classroom, put his things down on a desk, and laid down on the floor. He folded his hands on his chest, closed his eyes, and said not a word. We all stared at Professor Dusek and glanced around at each other for several minutes. Then he simply stood up, and began the day's lesson. Unforgettable!
What it is is an overused catch-all phrase that everybody says constantly (including us) most likely without even knowing it or thinking about it. It is a meaningless thing people say in response to a nearly infinite set of circumstances. You hear it at restaurants, when waiters want to know if you have finished your meal, or when you have put money/credit card in the leatherette check folder. "Would you like fresh-ground pepper?" "No, thank you. I am All Set." You hear it at the conclusion of ordering something over the phone, or making an appointment or reservation. We have even heard it said at the conclusion of baiting a fish hook. "Here--you are All Set. Now, I will start a chum-line."
In the main, All Set implies either readiness or the completion of a task or activity. But can a waiter not say instead, "Shall I take the check?" or "Shall I clear the table?" Cannot the fishmonger cry "Let us ply the seas!" upon skewering the bait?
If All Set were to become a defined situation, distinguishable from say, Half Set, or Not Set, or even The Null Set (if we remember our Logic* correctly), then we would be more inclined to continue accepting it as part of the lexicon. If one could respond to the question, "Are you ready?" with, "No. I am quarter set. A moment longer, please," it would make all the difference in the world.
Barring this development, though, we are determined to exorcise this demon from our vocabulary. We urge all others to do the same.
______________
*We suddenly experienced a vivid echo of the past as soon as we typed this. We took a Logic course in college taught by this man. He was a splendidly odd person with an outsized, gangly body and a high voice. Sadly, he was not able to illuminate the mysteries of this impenetrable subject to us. We got a C+. But one day he walked into the classroom, put his things down on a desk, and laid down on the floor. He folded his hands on his chest, closed his eyes, and said not a word. We all stared at Professor Dusek and glanced around at each other for several minutes. Then he simply stood up, and began the day's lesson. Unforgettable!
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